Gender wars
Gender wars
Listened to a rather hilarious podcast episode of to my sisters. It’s been a while since I’ve listened to a podcast. I enjoyed it. But this one was on gender wars. How it’s dominated 2022. The last words were a word… Kevin Samuel’s is dead, Andrew Tate is in prison and we need to put the guns down. The war is over… skirmishes will still continue, but the war is over. These men are our brothers, colleagues, fathers, uncles. I’m bored. Now to be clear. I’m not telling you to open your legs and arms to the emotionally stunted. But the hyperbole is grating. The way that the internet talks you would think that cheating is an everyday occurrence. In real life it’s incredibly rare. I say that as someone who was cheated on 4 times. The scum of the earth will always exist, but most normal people don’t actually interact with the trashy people. I have learnt that as someone who was married to one. People go into relationships to increase peace. If you are addicted to drama, you will repel most people. Regardless of gender. I’m personally very conservative, so I actually reject a lot of men. Because I’m picky. I’m not a clown so I’m not here to entertain men. I also am a firm believer that if you entertain idleness you can miss out on your husband. So I don’t entertain or encourage a man who I’m not interested in. I date to marry and I mind my business. I do no man harm. There’s a man after me, it’s kind of nice being pursued but there’s no way I would have him in my presence voluntarily let alone date him. And I am not conceited enough to gather a fan club of men in my thrall. If I wanted to then I would get an onlyfans. I don’t have one. To be clear. But the way men on the internet are they act like a woman having an onlyfans is as common as a woman wearing pink. It isn’t. Less than 1% of women in the U.K. have an onlyfans or work in the adult/sex industry. It’s actually pretty rare. (I made up that statistic to make a point) but if you know lots of people with an onlyfans then you need to be more discerning about the company you keep. I sure as hell don’t know anyone (actually never been on onlyfans so don’t know) I digress. My point is, there is a very simple way of maintaining your inner peace. Keep your circle small and filled with high quality people and mind your business. In a stroke I have solved 70% of your problems with both the opposite gender and the same gender. Funnily Kevin Samuel’s and Andrew Tate have both said this. They’re just very superficial about it. They dictate worth and value in the body count of people which is a number that both men and women can and do lie about. Which is dumb. A man’s body count doesn’t matter. Because men don’t get good at sex and relationships until mid 30’s… at best. If you’re in a relationship with a man under 32 you are practice for his wife. She thanks you. Which is why I don’t advocate sex before marriage. Because there is no good in forming soul ties with a man who is a work in progress. Same thing with women. My ex doesn’t know me. I didn’t know me. A woman’s first relationship, a woman’s first “ glow up” is transformative. And so another piece of gold is that you are only viewing a snapshot of a person. People change. That ugly girl? She grows up to become a sexy woman. That boy you can’t trust with money? Grows up to become a millionaire. That cheater or liar will unfortunately always be a cheater and liar because some things are a part of your character and if you have weak character then you can’t be helped. But for the most part people grow. So you are often going to war with a straw man but the reality is people are complicated, and constantly evolving. Also, if you have someone who isn’t evolving…run.
But like I said, if you follow the “ keep your circle small and full of high quality people, and mind your business” you will never fall foul in the gender wars
So ladies and gentlemen… put down your guns. Make love (healthy marriage love) not war.
Grace and Courage
Annetta Mother Smith